


But Why is the Rum Gone?

by captainswanismyendgame



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV), Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: Crossover, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 06:45:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7790971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainswanismyendgame/pseuds/captainswanismyendgame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Killian asks Emma where she wants to go to get away from it all, and she picks Tourtuga. Who do they run into along the way?</p>
            </blockquote>





	But Why is the Rum Gone?

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: You can thank thegladelf on Tumblr for all of her headcanons this morning. This just needed to get out of me.

It had been ages since Killian and Emma were able to spend time alone, and to be honest, they felt quite bored. After spending most of their time together chasing down an ice queen and whole gaggle of evil witches, both becoming Dark Ones, and then spending time in the Underworld, the idea of a quiet moment seemed to be a novelty that they would never be rewarded. So weeks and weeks went by with no crises to speak of, and when they finally get a chance to see what was on Netflix and cuddle on the couch in their home for long stretches of time, it just never felt right; they felt restless.

 

“Are we truly incapable of enjoying the quiet moments?” Emma lamented, as she buried her face into his shoulder and sighed.

 

Killian wrapped his right arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer into his body. He rubbed his hand over her arms, attempting to ease her anxiety. “Now Swan, I don’t think we are incapable of enjoying them. We just don’t know what to do with them, since we get so little of them.”

 

“I just...ugh...I don’t know why I can just relax!”

 

Hearing the frustration in her voice made him upset, and he wanted to try his best to cheer her up. “Well, how about we get out of the house? On a vacation of sorts?”

 

This cause Emma to jump out of her nook she created in between his arm and torso. “A vacation?”

 

“Yes, love. Just you and I.”

 

A smile appeared on her face, and her green eyes shone brighter than a few minutes before. “I think that is just what the doctor ordered.”

 

A confused look fell across Killian’s face. “Well, I’m no doctor, but I’m glad you agree. Now, where would you like to go?”

 

She started to answer, but if she were being completely honest, she had no idea. “Well, I mean, I know New York is out; we’ve been there a few times. And I don’t really have a desire to go back to Boston…”

 

“That’s not what I meant, love. I meant what land would you like to go to?”

 

Emma was shocked by his question. “What are you talking about? We can’t visit another land? To do that, we would have to have a magic…” Emma’s thought died as Killian sat up from his spot on the couch to dig something out of his pocket. He revealed to Emma its contents: two small, transparent beans. Emma sat with her mouth agape looking at it sitting in his palm, while he stood there, smirking at her reaction.

 

“But...how…”

 

“Let’s just saw Belle saw fit to have The Dark One thank me for treating his wife well while she was delivering little Francis.”

 

“You really are a natural with children.”

 

“Care to see how I am when they are my own?” he said wiggling his eyebrows at her.

 

Emma snorted as she walked up to him and tugged on the collar of his shirt. “Easy, tiger, we have plenty of time to discuss that later. Right now, you promised me a getaway.”

 

“Indeed I did. Now, where can I escort you, milady?” he asked as he bowed like a gentleman of the royal court.

 

It didn’t take her long to ask, considering she had been dying to know if a certain port of call actually existed. “How about Tortuga?”

 

His head lifted from staring at the ground to look right at her eyes. He knew that look: Emma really wanted an adventure. “Are you certain? The inhabitants and visitors alike on the port of Tortuga are a surly bunch. You might need someone to look after you at all times.”

 

“Who better to be my escort than Captain Hook?” she whispered in his ear.

 

“True that, lass. But I fear these modern garments might be cause for some confusion. Remember what I said about your red leather jacket on our first voyage to the Enchanted Forest?”

 

“Of course I do. You kept eyeing me in my corset,” she winked.

 

“I can appreciate a work of art when I see one, love,” he winked back.

 

Smiling, she said, “Ok so, wardrobe change?” With a flick of her finger, Killian was once again adorned in his leather duster and red vest, while Emma appeared in an emerald green corset and skirt with an ivory shirt that covered only her upper arms. Killian had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep the moan from escaping at the sight of her.

 

“I am beginning to wonder why you don’t wear corsets more often.”

 

“Because, as I said before, the hurt. But, I needed to play the part of the captain’s wench.”

 

“You will never be just a wench, Swan. You are my everything,” he said in a deep timbre. Killian walked briskly over to Emma, pressing his lips to hers in a demanding kiss. He wanted to to keep the kiss going, but she gently pushed him away, earning a sad whine from him. “Killian, if you keep that up, we won’t make it out of the house.”

 

Rolling his eyes, he conceded. “As the lady insists…”

 

He escorted her to their backyard, only a few feet from the shed. He tossed one of the beans into the air, pocketing the other one. Within seconds, the bean-created portal swirled in front of them. Emma grasped onto his hook as they both jumped through the magical gateway. Moments later, they landed with a thud on the wooden walkways of the pier.

 

Killian pushed himself from the wooden planks, and then lifted Emma up after, allowing her to grab onto his arm to ease herself upright. They were welcomed to port by almost getting shoved into the ocean by a pair of bickering lovers and by another man attempting to grab Emma’s ass. Killian stopped the man quickly, placing his hook right in the man’s face. “Don’t touch what isn’t yours, mate,” he gritted through his teeth. At the sight of the hook, the man shrunk. “My apologies, Captain. I didn’t know she was with you.”

 

“Doesn’t matter. Now where are you needing a new scar? Your left cheek or your right?”

 

From behind him, he heard Emma call out, “Killian, come on! He’s not worth it. Let’s just go and find that tavern you were telling me about.”

 

Killian forced himself to drop his hook. “You’re lucky she gave you mercy. No be gone with you.” Neither of them had ever seen a man run for his like quicker than he had. Emma came up from behind him, rubbing his shoulders. “While I appreciate you defending your lady’s honor, need I remind you that I am perfectly capable of handling guys like himself?”

 

“Aye, lass. But I just can’t help it. Nobody touches my love and lives to tell the tale...unless she sends them running away like a stuck pig,” he joked.

 

“Damn right. Now, let’s go get a drink, shall we?” She took the elbow he offered to her, and they made their way to one of his favorite watering holes: The Gilded Lady. The name was derived by the fact the the lights that surrounded shone so brightly throughout the place that it gave off the illusion that the walls were made of gold. As the entered the establishment, all eyes turned to its new occupants, and everyone went silent. It had been years since Captain Hook had visited Tortuga, so it came as quite a surprise to see him not only without his crew, but accompanied by a stunning blonde.

 

The barkeep, a svelte blonde man by the name of Barney, broke the silence, “Well, if it isn’t Killian Jones. Been ages, it has.”

 

“It sure has, Barn. Still fat I see.”

 

“And you’re still ugly.”

 

Both men erupted into a fit of laughter. Barney then said, “Get your mangy arse up here and have a drink with me!”

 

“Gladly.” The commotion of the tavern turned back to normal as they walked over the bar. He made sure Emma had a seat before he sat next to her.

 

“So, who is the lass?” Barney asked.

 

“Barney, this is Emma Swan. My true love.”

 

Barney’s eyes went wide. “You’re fucking with me.”

 

Killian shook his head. “It’s true. We found out a few weeks ago,” he admitted as he took her wrist and placed a kiss on her glowing skin.

 

Emma stuck out her hand for Barney to take. “Nice to meet you.” Barney grabbed it, shocked that a woman would greet him in such a way, but shook her hand nonetheless.

 

“Likewise. I’ve known this man here for many year. Had a lot of ups and downs, this one. I just hope that you can see him for who he is beyond all of that.”

 

Emma placed her hand on Killian’s legs and squeezed. “Of course I do. That’s what made him into the man I love.”

 

“Indeed,” Barney said, smiling at the two of them. “I think this calls for a celebration. One round on the house. I know the Captain’s poison, what’s yours, milady?”

 

“I’ll take rum as well.”

 

“I like this lass already,” Barney said while flashing Killian a smile. Barney poured both Killian and Emma three fingers of Killian’s favorite Tortugan rum. It was spicy with a note of local oranges. Emma commented on how delicious it was, and Killian was ecstatic that he could share another one of his favorite things with her. They chatted for a about ten minutes when they heard rumbling of a fight just outside the tavern.

 

“Just another night in Tortuga, eh, Barn?” Killian asked as he took another sip of his rum.

 

“You can say that again…”

 

All of a sudden, a voice Killian recognized was singled out amongst the voices. It was a distinctly slurred voice, one that Killian had become accustomed to hearing many times over the course of his travels. “You will always remember this as the day that you lost your money to…” The man didn’t get to finish as his body flew through the door of the tavern, landing on two tables with customers, splashing drinks and breaking wood. The man groaned as he lie atop the broken tables, but he still managed to finish his sentence. “Captain Jack Sparrow.”

 

Emma couldn’t breathe. Not only was Tortuga real, and that it was infested with pirates, but HE was real. “Is that who I think it is?” she whispered to Barney.

 

“Aye, Captain Jack Sparrow. Worst captain to sail the seven seas.”

 

“Some might say he’s the best,” she giggled. She looked over to Killian as he went to get up from his stool. “Killian? Are you okay?”

 

“I am, love. I just need to say hello to an old friend.” With that he hopped off of his stool, and walked over to the mess on the ground a few feet away. Killian grasped the back of Jack’s shirt and jerked up so he could attempt to stand. Jack’s eyes were somewhat glazed over, but his face lit up when he saw who was in front of him. “Killy! How are you, mate?!” Jack slurred “It’s been ages! Did you end up skinning that crocodile you kept mumbling about?”

 

 

 

“Jack, you’re looking as...drunk as ever.”

 

“What can I say? I do love the rum.”

 

Their conversation was cut short by the shrill voice of a woman calling from the entrance. “Where is my good for nothing husband?” The woman in question was equal part regal and fierce. Killian could tell she had come from a posh upbringing, but her attire suggested that she left such comforts to pursue a life of piracy and adventure. Her eyes glanced around the room, searching for the man in question, until the landed on Killian and Jack. Jack looked right at Killian and said, “Oh, bugger.”

 

“Care to tell me something, old bean?” Killian asked.

 

“Yes, well, I may or may not have...gotten married since last we saw one another,” Jack said, nervously waving his arms in the air.

 

The fiery woman approached them. “Jack, why in the world to do you think it’s okay to leave me on the Pearl while you are off gallivanting about?”

 

He pointed a finger at Killian, as if to ask for a moment, and then turned around to address his wife. “Elizabeth. Liz. Lizzie, darling…”

 

“Don’t you ‘Lizzie, darling’ me, Jack. Why did you leave without me?”

 

“You were just so beautiful sleeping, darling. I didn’t want to wake you,” he said, flashing his awful teeth at her. “You don’t trust me?”

 

“I trust you. It’s all of these slags I don’t trust…”

 

He placed his dirty hands on her creamy white cheeks. “No one could hold a candle you, Lizzie. You are the the first mate of the Black Pearl.”

 

“Ahem!”

 

Rolling his eyes, he amended his statement. “Yes, yes, you’re the captain. But you’re my first mate.”

 

This got her to smile. “That’s a little better.”

 

“Now, what do you say to meeting an old friend of mine, savvy?” Jack turned back around to face Killian, and Killian’s eyes went wide. “Captain Elizabeth Swann, meet Captain Killian Jones, aka the infamous Captain Hook.”

 

“Wait a second, you married Elizabeth?!” Killian screeched.

 

Elizabeth looked toward Killian then to Jack again. “You know Killian?”

 

Killian looked back to Emma and then to Barney. “Hey Barn, hide the rum. This lass can’t hold her liquor for shit!”

 

Jack mumbled behind her, “Don’t I know it.” This earned a swat on the chest from Elizabeth. “But how do you to know each other?”

 

“When Killian was in the Royal Navy, he would come to Port Royal a lot. We became friends,” Elizabeth answered.

 

“But then after my excursion to Neverland, we never saw one another after that. But it looks like you’ve done well, in a matter of speaking. Captain of the Black Pearl, eh? A fine vessel indeed. One could even say it rivals even my Jolly.”

 

“Care to put a wager on it?” Elizabeth asked.

 

“Sorry, lass, not today. I’m actually here with my lady love. Come, say hello.” Killian waved both Jack and Elizabeth to follow him over to where Emma sat, still in shock over the fact that Jack Sparrow and Elizabeth Swan were not only real, but coming over her. She adjusted herself quickly, and then Killian came to stand behind. “Captains, this is Emma Swan. My true love.”

 

Just as Barney had, both of them looked at Killian in surprise. “Is she really, Killian?” Elizabeth asked with tears in her eyes. When he nodded, Elizabeth closed the distance between them to embrace Emma. “I’m so happy for you and Killian. He deserves all the love in the world. Also, love the name,” she added as she winked.

 

It was Jack’s turn to make his acquaintance, taking Emma’s hand and placing a kiss on her knuckle. “Pleasure to meet you, lass. I knew this scurvy sea dog in the worst of times. Be the light he needs.”

 

Nervously, she replied, “I shall endeavor to do so!”

 

“Blimey, you even have her talking like you! Next thing you know, she’ll be stealing your rum!”

 

“Speaking of which, order us another round, Killian,” Elizabeth ordered.

 

“Nice try, Liz, but the only Swan I take orders from is Emma,” he winked. 

 

“Oh, fine! Please order us another round?” she asked.

 

“Much better.” Killian turned to Emma and asked, “What say you, love? Care for another round with these two?”

 

“I would love that very much!” Emma squealed.

 

“Alright, then! Barn, another round!”

 

Barney had to break the bad news. “Sorry, Killian. We ran out of rum for the night.”

 

This didn’t sit well with Jack. “But why is the rum gone?!?”


End file.
